Bottom burp

Why are we so embarrassed by flatulence? Did you know that the average person passes gas 14 times per day!
I once dated a guy who insisted that gas only be released in the washroom. While that is nice and pleasant in an ideal world. In reality it is not always possibly. The walk to a washroom can often take minutes and sometimes that pressure just won’t wait!
Now when I say sometimes it cannot be avoided, that does not mean I think it’s acceptable to just let rip.
I worked with a guy who took great pleasure to release his noxious odor once the lift had reached full capacity. He thought it was hysterical until one day the lift got stuck and he was almost gagging with his own smell lol.
I am ashamed to say that I recently went to collect my baby from my Mother in laws. It was a long drive and my belly started to hurt. I wanted to dash in and dash out but she started talking. Trying not to be rude and cut her off I was listening while squeezing those butt cheeks as tight as I could. Then I felt it escape. Relief filled me as I knew there was no noise! As I turned to leave she asked if I smelt something! OMG talk about embarrassing. I quickly blamed it on the baby! (I know, I’m ashamed!) mother in law didn’t want to leave it there and suggested I go check the diaper! Poor baby… I added to the lie and fabricated that I knew it was just gas, as I felt the rumble! Seriously! Why couldn’t I just say excuse me and leave?
Fart, toot, shart, poop, bottom burp, what ever you call it.. We would blow up to the size of a hot air balloon if we didn’t do it. So my advice is, where ever you be, let the air go free! ( within reason of course LOL


About yorkshiremummy

Born and Raised in Yorkshire, Now at Large in North America. Working Wife and Mum of 2. Occasionally sarcastic, Often inappropriate, but always real! Having snorkeled with sharks in the Maldives, ridden an Elephant in Sri Lanka, swum in an underground river in Mexico and played with Lion cubs in South Africa, currently enjoying the crazy adventure of motherhood!
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